Friday Wrapup

Let's get to it!

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This week's book is "The Oregon Trail" by Rinker Buck.  Um, does anyone else remember playing this game in elementary school? I loooooved this game. But I was always so bummed out when one of my horses would die and then my family would start to die off because we got some weird Old Timey disease that's probably coming back soon because we don't vaccinate our kids anymore.

But, then again, I loved dressing up in old-timey clothes every chance I got. And in my mind, I was wearing these outfits while playing The Oregon Trail during indoor recess:

CB also got in on the fun. We were destined to be old together.

Anyway, check out the blog here! Plus, my dad totally calls out CB, who's a reading machine and NEEDS TO BLOG MORE. ("Hi, pot? It's kettle. You're black." I know, I know.) 

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I've been sick all month. Like, I usually exaggerate for effect and stuff, but this is no exaggeration. AND SO, I've been watching a lot of "Keeping Up With the Kardashians." I'm not saying I'm proud of this, I'm just giving you a glimpse into my world when I'm on antibiotics and feverish.

I may have also tried giving myself cheekbones - ala Kim, Kourtney, and Khloe - and ended up looking sort of like someone smeared mud on my face and walked away.

Anyway.

While I was watching the other day, CB found himself in the unlucky position of being in the room.

And then we had this conversation:

Me: "Which one do you think is the prettiest?"
CB, without hesitation: "The short one."
Me: "Kourtney?"
CB: "Sure."

Silence.

Me: "Do you think Kim is good looking?"
CB: "Eh, I mean, she's attractive, but she has this reputation of being smoking hot and I don't get it. I mean, maybe back ten years ago it was novel or something, but she's nothing like everyone makes her out to be. There are girls way better looking than her."

Silence.

CB: "I mean, you - "

Now let me stop you guys right here, before I share the rest of this conversation. As CB was talking, he was gesturing towards me and immediately in my mind I was like 'Oh my God, he's about to say that I'm prettier than Kim Kardashian.' Which is not, like, my goal in life. BUT it was a moment of feeling all mushy towards CB because he's so clearly blinded by love that he may possibly find his wife more attractive than a woman who broke the internet by showing the world her butt.

Ok, let's continue:

CB: "I mean, you pass women who are much better looking than her every day in the city on your way to and from work."
Me: "Um, I hate you."
CB: "What?"
Me: "I actually thought you were about to say that I was prettier, in your eyes. But then you said that I pass prettier people than her everyday. Which is true, don't get me wrong! But I actually just had the fastest love/hate relationship with you of all time."
CB, laughing: "Well of course you're-"
Me: "NOPE! Don't even try, the moment has passed. I'm not mad, I agree with you! But it was funny how quickly my narcissistic mind went from you thinking I'm prettier than Kim Kardashian to being like 'ooooooooooooooooooooooh that's not even close to what he's saying'."
CB, still laughing: "Oh man, somehow I can still get in trouble without even saying I think Kim Kardashian is hot! Incredible."
Me: "Yes, incredible."

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And now, the Video of the Week.

I love Sara Bareilles, this is not news. Earlier this week, I actually had a "Becky Confrontation" with someone I see all the time (it's sort of "confrontation-lite", if you will, since I HATE confrontation but have been standing up for myself/surprisingly vocal lately. CB calls it "Mama Bear Becky.")  and then this morning I heard this song. And it seemed fitting! So, enjoy! Happy Friday!

Reduce, Reuse, Reboring.

I need to make a confession: I’m a lazy recycler. I know that this is an unpopular stance, but honestly, if CB didn’t do all of the recycling for us, I’d likely do very little (read: probably none?) It’s a weird part of my personality that I don’t really understand, but I’ve always been a lazy recycler and I’ve done next to nothing to fix that, admittedly. But I blame CB because he’s created a spoiled, lazy, non-recycling monster by always doing it.

Annoyingly, though, like, all of our friends are super-recyclers and it comes up more often than you’d think. Which makes us sound insanely boring but my guess is that everyone just wants to be part of Leonardo DiCaprio’s Green Squad or something and so they separate their plastic from their cardboard.

Anyway. So CB has set up this little recycling area in our front closet – one little bin for our bottles and cans/plastics, I think, and another for our cardboard, paper, etc. He separates it and then puts it in our recycling room which, I should add, is on our floor, across the hall, so that shows you JUST how lazy I am. I’ve almost never actually used our recycling room.

Except one time, just after the room had been “revamped” and there were shelves and labels for different things to be placed in different areas. So I put a box in there (no, I didn’t break it down or anything) and left. A few hours later, CB went to recycle some stuff and came back and said “They re-did the recycling room with nice signs and shelves and everything!” (See? We’re losers.) And I was like “Oh yeah, I saw that!” and then he was like “But it’s annoying because someone has already just thrown a box in there, not even paying attention to the signs!”

To which I was like “Um, yeah, that was definitely me.” And then he talked to me for a few minutes about what was wrong with me and I nodded until he realized it was all wasted time he’d never get back.

Well, yesterday, as CB was yet again recycling (seriously, dude, get a hobby), we had this exchange:

CB: “Um, Beck?”
Me: “Yeah?”
CB: “You do know that the recycling bag is actually a bag and not a shelf where you just sort of place your recycling stuff on top of it…right?”
Me: “Ooooh, that’s a bag. I was confused.”
CB, laughing: “I figured because that’s the only logical explanation for why you don’t simply open the bag and place the recycling inside of it.”
Me: “Yep, that’s the only logical explanation!”

And then I walked over to the closet in front of which he was standing.

CB, pointing to the bag: “See? This is a bag. You just open it up and place everything inside. It’s how bags work.”
Me: “Ooooh. That makes total sense now!”
CB, laughing and shaking his head: “You’re a piece of work.”
Me: “Actually, to be fair, you should really be thanking me.”
CB: “Oh yeah?”
Me: “Yeah. Remember a few weeks ago when you told me that I shouldn’t be putting the paper with  the plastic all in the same bin, and then showed me the bag where the cardboard and paper should go? Well I listened and I’m not putting them all together anymore.”
CB: “You’re right, you’ve made a very small step in the right direction. Now if you could just comprehend the concept of a bag versus a shelf, I’ll never mention it again.”
Me: “I’ll work on it, probably.”

I see no problem. 

Happy Thursday! 

Conversations from Cohabitation: We Are Officially Gross

(It should be noted that this post in no way reflects the fact that today is the birthday of both my mom and my niece, two incredible people who I'm lucky to know. Happy birthday!)

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CB and I have devolved into completely disgusting human beings. Every morning, he sends me pictures as he gets her ready for drop-off. This morning, as I was kissing her goodbye, I could....smell something. I was like "Oh! You left your dad a gift! Good timing! Bye!" and then ran out yelling "she needs a clean diaper!"

Because I'm a good wife and CB is so grateful for every day with me.

So about an hour later, he sent me the regular pictures and then the following text exchange happened:

Then he sent the picture, which I am not sharing because I do have some decorum. More for future-daughter than anything. 

Happy Wednesday!

Friday Wrapup

Let's get to it!

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You guys. I've been MIA lately for a few reasons. The main reason is because, about a week and a half ago, an urgent care doctor stuck a skinny, long Q-tip up my nose and wiggled it around on my sinuses until my eyes watered and then told me I had the flu. And then I didn't move for about 4 days, spent 3 days after that sort of feeling more human, and then finally came back to work this week. Also, what my parents have called my "flare for the dramatic" may have come out during this time because I told CB that, in my fevered, achy state, I actually wondered if this is what dying feels like. Because I thought I was dying of the flu. Because I'm just like my daughter, who flings herself backwards in excitement/anger/frustration/glee/exhaustion because she got my flare.

CB is so lucky.

ANYWAY, between that and balancing what has turned out to be a great, but busy and exhausting, new work/life schedule...well, I suck at blogging. However, I'll attempt to get back to some sort of normal routine next week, which guarantees that I may or may not blog. Exciting! The fact that you guys are still visiting the site in my absence warms my heart and also tells me that there's little quality entertainment out there these days.

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No book review this week but maybe next week? We need to peer-pressure CB. He's been a reading machine after I go to bed at 8:17pm each night.

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I took a picture on the train today of a guy with a man-bun.

The reason I creepily took this picture is multi-layered:

1. Man-buns both intrigue and anger me.
2. This guy legit looked like he was maybe doing a photo shoot with someone who had an invisible camera? Not like he was acting like he was posing, I think he just....is. Like, he's SO good looking that he just always kind of looks like someone who should be having his photo taken.
3. I stared at him through the veil of fake-playing Solitaire on my phone and thought a lot about his attractiveness. Because he was, without question, incredibly handsome. Attractive. Had bone structure to die for. HOWEVER. I decided that he actually was so attractive that I wasn't attracted to him.

Let me explain.

Part of it may be a deep-seated insecurity on my part. OR an incredible self-awareness. Because I fully embrace the cast system when it comes to dating and mating. You have to date and mate with your kind, people. It's just the truth.

Have you ever seen a couple and you kind of look over at your friend and you do the one eyebrow and you're like "what gives?" And your friend's like "I know, right?" Because both people in that couple are dating above or below their level. I KNOW IT'S CONTROVERSIAL. But that's why you come to this blog.

Your level can be fluid, and 1 or 2 above and below at any time makes total sense, because people change. Like, you may get into slightly better shape than you were when you met, but it doesn't automatically jump you from a 6 to a 10. AT BEST it typically jumps you from a 6 to an 8. And this is coming from a steady 6, you guys. CB was this close to marrying down until I upped my game.

Also, I'm confident enough in my place in this world to know that I'd never feel comfortable naked in front of this man. He likely doesn't have "house pants," and if he does, they're definitely on-label. He probably also wouldn't embrace my Michigan State t-shirt with the growing hole in the armpit that I wear a little too liberally on weekends, where you can see the front and back of part of my bra. And not in a sexy way.

I'm also confident enough in my place in this world to know that this man-bun would never feel comfortable with me naked in front of him, either. And that's OK. He didn't belong on this train. He belonged on a sound-stage with a fake train set where he pretended to be just another guy in the city who didn't realize he was falling in love with his "dorky" best friend who was stunningly beautiful yet we were all "fooled" because she wore glasses until the makeover montage.

Anyway. This is what I did on the train today. Perhaps I still have a fever?


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And now, the Video of the Week.

This movie, and specifically this soundtrack, has lots of sentimental meaning to me, and it seemed appropriate on this Friday. PLUS, I didn't even realize it until JUST NOW, but it's totally telling you to do the exact opposite of what we just discussed. CONTROVERSY!

Happy Friday, you guys!