Carving Pumpkins: An Exercise in Compromise

All I’ve really got to say is that if we end up making kids half as well as we make pumpkins, this world is in for a treat - there was a lot of high-fiving last night over our teamwork. Though it should be noted that I was never in charge of the carving or cleaning out of the pumpkin guts. The non-carving is just good safety and the pumpkin guts thing is less because it feels like you’re ripping out the insides of your own stomach and more because both of our hands wouldn’t fit into the pumpkin and so I didn’t want to slow down the process...is what I told CB.

Also, I was busy monitoring the status of the pumpkin guts bowl balancing on the edge of the table and not saying anything because I didn’t want to be bossy since CB’s hands were elbow-deep in vegetable goo. But all I kept thinking was “the bowl’s gonna fall, the bowl’s gonna fall.” And so then, when the bowl fell, I felt less concerned for our rug and more content that I was right. Which is something I’m working on, I get it.

However, I believe we’ve narrowed in on why, exactly, the bowl fell in the first place. Someone was distracted by a show that he doesn’t care at all about and thinks is too soap oper-y.

Exhibit A.

I will acknowledge, though, the lack of Beyonce anywhere in our apartment for the holiday season and it’s a damn shame. One of you faithful blog readers pointed out via Facebook that, while the pumpkin is delightful, it does not at all resemble Mrs. Carter. But when I broached the subject to CB, he didn’t even let me finish the sentence:

CB: “No.”
Me: “But-“
CB: “Not happening. We’re not carving a Beyonce pumpkin.”
Me: “Well what if next year we get two?”
CB: “That’s fine, but you’re going to have to do all of the carving for your special pumpkin.”

Me, thinking about it.

Me: “Yeah…just one pumpkin is fine. It might be overkill to have her face lit up every night anyway.”

And then a little bit of my soul died for lying straight to my husband’s face. Because Beyonce’s carved image lit up in our apartment every night is basically my dream come true. So I guess this is what they mean when they say marriage is hard work.

Happy Wednesday, everyone! Did you carve your pumpkins yet??