Monday, March 25, 2013

"Hey, at least we didn't get shot!" and other things you hear kids say at bars these days.

Theoretically, I am a grown-up. Or at least I suppose I look like a grown up most of the time when I’m not wearing my glitter shoes. But I forget that other people can tell that I’m a grown up until I’m around “adults” who weren’t born when “Dirty Dancing” came out. Which makes me sad for them. And for me.

You see, a few friends and I decided to go out for some drinks and a good time at a bar downtown over the weekend. And for a few hours it was mainly us, our vodka, the friendly rapport with the bartender that rendered free shots, and a lot of laughs.

However, somewhere around 9pm, the place started to get young. And loud. And it’s possible that when the DJ started playing his club mixes, all five of us nearly hit the floor because we thought a gunshot had gone off and we were all going to die.

True story.

But as it turned out, it was just the beginning of a Justin Bieber song that he had turned up way too loud, and so then it was a toss-up between who would’ve preferred the gunshot.

Anyway, we soldiered on because that’s how we roll, until we realized that all of us had been having five separate conversations for the last 25 minutes because we couldn’t hear what anyone else was saying. And so we went downstairs to see if it was any quieter and less crowded downstairs.

You know, like kids these days do.

And wouldn’t you know it, there was a whole room off to the side with exactly five lounge chairs and a table that was just begging to be used! However, we seemed to be the only people in the bar excited about this discovery. Inexplicably.

Though it may have had something to do with the fact that the action was where everyone else was standing shoulder-to-shoulder with other people who thought it was totally cool when they played “retro” hits by Pearl Jam and U2.  Nevertheless, people would periodically stick their heads into the lounge to check out the “scene,” and would then quickly get ushered into the other room by a friend in the know so that they could hang out with the rest of humanity.
"Hey ladies, why don't you
come sit over here so you
can get away from all of the
shenanigans and tomfoolery."

But whatever, we were finally able to hear ourselves think and drink and laugh about when we were young and stupid and stayed out past midnight. So let’s consider that success.

Also, it’s possible that CB offered a group of cute girls our room as we were leaving, but they quickly looked in, looked at us, and kept walking. Which made me sad that CB’s “game” had been reduced to chatting up 23 year old girls simply to offer them some solace from the noise as he got up to leave and go eat leftover pizza with his Golden Girls Girlfriend on a Saturday night. 

But hey, if that's not love, I don't know what is!

Happy Monday, everyone! 


  1. Nothing makes me feel older than being out at one of "those places" on a weekend after 9! Except how I feel the next day...

  2. I loved your weekend plans, and thinking back to when I was that young person...standing there being "cool" isn't that much fun anyway! Random but I thought of you this morning when, on the subway, a man stood a little too close to me and started singing VERY loudly. And he was no American Idol, I'll tell you. I sort of wished you were there to write it into a hilarious story ;)

    1. Haha I wish I was there, too! Sounds much more interesting than my commute this morning!

  3. Golden Girls get all the love (and rightly so) but didn't anyone else like Designing Women or am I the only one?

    My weekend was spent on the couch watching Season 4 and 5 of Psych so in my eyes you are the cool kids for even leaving the house.

    1. Oh, I watched myself some Designing Women back in the day, but I didn't get quite as into them as I did the Golden Girls.

      I'm glad I'm cool in someone's eyes!

  4. Nothing makes me feel like an old lady more than going to "those places" after 9 pm. I can literally feel myself turning into my mother. "My goodness, that girl really needs to put on a sweater, she's showing too much skin". "I wish those boys would pull their pants up".

  5. Okay, I'm 22 and I'd rather be with your crowd. Does that make me awesome or sad?

  6. I still remember the time I heard a radio DJ describe the Red Hot Chilli Peppers as veterans of the music industry. Jeez, DJ, way to make me feel old!

  7. My 21 year old receptionist recently referred to 80s music as ”oldies.” She wasn't trying to be funny or sarcastic. I wanted to cry a little. Or smack her. One of those.

    1. Um, that's ridiculous!!!! Ugh, it's a sad day when the music of our youth is now "oldies." Sigh.