Conversations from cohabitation

So, I kind of forgot on Monday that it was Monday because I was one of those fortunate people who had the day off to honor someone that kind of did a lot of bad things and also didn’t actually land in North America? But since the Christopher Columbus poem about 1492 is maybe the only poem I’ve ever memorized all the way through, I decided to allow my company to give me the day off and also forget that it was a blogging day.

I’m sorry, I’m sorry! I’m both lazy and maybe not as vigilant about genocide as I should be. But mostly lazy.

Anyway, sorry I didn’t post, but it was because I was busy having this conversation.

Me: “If you had to watch a tampon commercial or a douching commercial, which one would you prefer to watch?”
CB: “What is wrong with you?”
Me: “I’m just saying that you squirm pretty much at the sight of blue liquid on the screen or any mention of feminine anything. So now you have to choose.”
CB: “I don’t like this game.”
Me: “Choose.”
CB: “I don’t know, I just watched a tampon commercial a few minutes ago.”
Me: “So tampons?”
CB: “Yeah, I guess. But I really don’t ever want to watch that commercial where they talk about an uncomfortable feminine feeling “down there” for women of a certain age ever again.”
Me: “God I wish I would’ve been in the room for that one.”

Pause.

Me: “You know, just in the few months we’ve lived together, I feel like I’m desensitizing you to things like this.”
CB: “No, I’m just becoming dead inside.”
Me, laughing: “No, you’re getting in touch with your feminine side.”
CB: “I don’t think that’s happening. I think it’s more likely that I’m becoming like those guys who have been married for 40 years and just kind of sit there with that blank stare on their face. You know that look I’m talking about?”
Me, still laughing: “Yeah.”
CB: “Those are dead eyes.”
Me: “I love you, too.”

Happy Wednesday!