Wednesday, September 11, 2013

Conversations from Cohabitation

Since today isn't just another Wednesday, I wanted to also share my post from last year on this day in case anyone is feeling a little reflective. Please click here for last year's 9/11 post.


Last night, I sat down to eat an apple and read my book.

CB: “You love apples.”
Me: “I really do.”
CB: “Are apples your fruit of choice?”
Me: “Um…I guess so? I mean, I like other fruit, but apples are definitely my favorite. But I don’t like raspberries because they’re too furry. And I don’t love oranges. Or cherries. But I do like blueberries. Bananas have that weird texture thing, so that’s no good.
CB: “Peaches?”
Me, making a gagging face: “Ugh, no. Oooh, but I like pears.”
CB: “So basically you like apples and pears?”
Me: “And blueberries.”
CB: “Strawberries?”
Me: “I prefer strawberries if they’re in, like, Cool Whip. Or champagne.”
CB: “I think that’s a given.”
Me: “And I definitely don’t like fruit for dessert.”
CB: “Yep, I already knew that about you. You've made that pretty clear.”


Me: “What fruit do you like?”
CB: “Basically all of it.”
Me: “Bananas?”
CB: “Not really, but I eat them.”
Me: “Raspberries? Blueberries?”
CB: “No, they’re kind of too small.”
Me: “Oranges?”
CB: “Sure.”
Me: “Peaches, pears?”
CB: “They’re alright. I don’t like mangos or pineapple or anything.”
Me: “Um, so you basically don’t like all of it. You pretty much like what I like.”
CB: “I like watermelon.”
Me: “I like watermelon, too.”
CB: “And if it’s all together in a fruit salad, I like that.”
Me, laughing: “A salad of fruit?”
CB, laughing: “Yeah, you know, a fruit salad?”
Me: “I’ve never in my life seen or had a fruit salad.”
CB: “That’s impossible. Google it.”
Me, googling: “Ooooh, I want a fruit salad that looks like sangria.”
CB: “Um, that is sangria.”
Me: “Then that’s the kind of fruit salad I want.”
CB: “You know what?  I don’t like grapefruit, but my grandmother used to have grapefruit and sprinkle sugar over it and that was good.”
Me: “Well of course that’s good, you sprinkled sugar over it.”

Me: “Judge’s ruling on the worst fruit ever? The tomato.”
CB, laughing: “I don’t mind tomatoes, especially if you put salt or pepper and mozzarella cheese on it.”
Me: “You really like to make your fruit bad for you.”


Me: “We just spent a really long time talking about fruit.”
CB: “We really did.”


This morning, I was watching a news story on a Chobani Green Yogurt recall.

Me: “I’m going to die!”


Me, to Oliver, the cat: “I’m going to die and he doesn’t care.”

Oliver, ignoring me for his cardboard box.

Me, louder: “I’m going to die!”


Then I walked into the bedroom.

CB: “Why are you going to die?”
Me: “Because there’s a recall on certain Chobani Greek Yogurt. Which I eat every day! And I checked the expiration date and it falls in line with the ones they’re recalling.”
CB: “Why are they recalling it?”
Me: “Because of some kind of mold.”
CB: “You’ll be fine.”
Me: “How will I be fine if I eat mold?”
CB: “Eh, a little mold is good for you. Builds up your immunity.”
Me: “Um, I won’t need an immune system if I’m dead.”
CB: “You’re being very dramatic.”
Me: “You’ll be sad when I’m dead.”
CB: “I’ll take my chances.”

Have a great Wednesday, everyone!


  1. HAHA love it...I feel like this could be a weekly column of yours. And how do you two not like all these different kinds of fruit?! I love fruit...John hates peaches though which makes me very sad because I used to love to bake with them. Jeez, I could probably publish my own conversations hahahaha.

    1. I know, right? I'm worried we might get scurvy. You SHOULD publish your own conversations! Also, you can come over and bake fruit into desserts for me and change my mind. I will allow that.

  2. I love peaches! I can't understand why anyone wouldn't love peaches!

  3. I love that you guys ”get” each other! And, I had some of the scary Chobani in my fridge. If it's the affected kind, it's not subtle--lids bulge, and a frothy stream of yogurt drips down the side. I noticed it on one the day before they announced the recall, and thought it was weird (and threw it out, obviously), but just figured it had somehow gone bad. Then, the next day the recall was on the news, and I looked at the other 3 in my fridge and they were all like that. It was like that scene from The Exorcist, except with yogurt.

    1. Oooooh that would creep me out! Though I'm scared at my inability to not eat food when it's in front of me, so I'm not so sure I would've thrown it away. Which is disturbing. I'm glad you knew better!