I Look Like Every Woman in America. Especially Amy.

This morning I got on the PATH train, like I do every morning, and shoved my way through the crowd and towards a wall to lean on, like I do every morning. Except this morning, seemingly out of nowhere, a guy shoved his way over to me wearing scrubs and said hello.

Wait, ok, can we discuss this for just a minute? I see this all the time. People walking around the city in their scrubs. Which immediately makes me think two things: 1, You’re smart AND more altruistic than me, and 2, aren’t those supposed to be, like, clean? So maybe – especially if you’re going to work – you should wear normal people clothes? I mean, I get it, you want people to know you’re a doctor. I would too, for sure. But I also don’t want to die because of your city-scrubs that are all contaminated by my and other people’s germs.

And I always want to ask them if they’re coming or going, but then I remember that boundaries are what make society go ‘round, and so then I just stare to see if I can see any remnants of a 24-hour hospital shift to set my mind at ease that they’re not about to drag all their subway diseases into the hospital.

Sorry, got sidetracked. Back to the story.

Scrubs: “Hey, how’s it going?”
Me, confused and removing my ear buds: “Huh?”
Scrubs: “How are you doing?”
Me: “I’m fine? How are you?”
Scrubs: “Good, just heading into work, you know.”
Me (I KNEW it!): “Oh yeah, me too.”

Awkward silence.

Scrubs: “How’s Paul?”
Me: “What?”
Scrubs: “I heard you guys are getting married, that’s great!”
Me: “You mean CB?”
Scrubs: “What?”
Me: “Wait…do you know me?”
Scrubs, laughing: “Oh sh*t, I’m so sorry! I thought you were someone else.”
Me, laughing and relieved that I didn’t just forget a friend: “Oh no problem! I just thought you were friendly. And then you brought up Paul, but I’m getting married, too, so then I thought maybe you just forgot his name.”
Scrubs: “So sorry! And congratulations!”
Me: “Thanks!”

Silence. And now we’re just standing really close to each other on a moving train without knowing each other.

Me: “Did you think my name was Amy?”
Scrubs: “What?”
Me: “I get mistaken for Amy all the time. Except not, like, by face, but people always call me Amy.”
Scrubs, feeling more awkward now: “Uh, no, I thought you were Elise.”
Me: “Oh. That’s a pretty name.”

Awkward silence.

Scrubs: “But now that you say it, you do look like an Amy.”
Me: “I know! I hear that all the time. I was just telling friends that I think I’m secret-named Amy because people have called me that since I was little.”
Scrubs, feeling weird because I’m weird: “That’s wild.”

Silence.

More silence.

My stop.

Me: “Well, have a good day at work!”
Scrubs: “Thanks, Amy, you too!”

End scene.

Happy Wednesday, everyone! Also, what on EARTH should the video of the week be this Friday?? I’m at a loss! And my dad will be mad if I put anymore Jay-Z on there. So help a girl out.