And then there's the time that the Internet made me feel dumber than a housecat.

Do you know what makes me feel like a failure? Trying to figure out what the hell that random concoction of numbers and letters is in that stupid little box you have to fill out anytime you send anything electronically through a website. Seriously, I don’t need extra stress in my day, web designers, I struggle through basic tasks as it is. But my favorite part about this ridiculous exercise, is that half the time there’s some cute little saying above it that reads: “Enter the characters in the image to verify you are human.”

There are a few things wrong here. First, how on earth would my cat figure out how to log onto the Food Network to search for “Fun BBQ side dishes,” find the exact one that everyone I know would want to eat, figure out how to click the little button off to the side that says “Email it!”, type out someone’s coherent email address….but then get to a box with, like, a pQ*$Ty in it and then be all like “Oh damn, they figured me out! I’m not a human!” I mean, for real. Cat’s don’t even know how to cook. So he’d obviously not be on the Food Network’s website. Duh.

Click....click......mmmmm cheesy potatoes....click...click...damn you, Internet! Foiled again!

Also, maybe I’m not a human.

Because, for real, I have to hit “refresh” until some normal looking letters and numbers come up on the screen, and sometimes it’s, like, 5 refreshes and I’m worried that some sort of alarm will go off on my computer, alerting those around me to the fact that I couldn’t figure out what letters were in the box and that I might not be human! Also, that I’m looking online at the Food Network during my lunch break at work. But whatever.  

No joke, that box causes me anxiety. Every time I’m like “Now this is ridiculous, nobody could read that!” I then start to panic that I’m the only person who maybe can’t figure out that I’m looking at three lowercase letters and a pound sign. It’s like a visual word problem, and we all know how I feel about math.  

Wow. That was traumatic.

Also, what would you guys want to eat at a Memorial Day BBQ? You know, hypothetically.