Tuesday, August 14, 2012

Snickers on a Tuesday and why Sarah McLaughlin is killing my joy.


Is it just me, or is the ASPCA inadvertently causing cruelty to humans by trying to prevent cruelty to animals?Because for real, if I hear that Sarah McLaughlin commercial one more time before I can plug my ears and close my eyes and blindly search for the remote, I will lose it. I cannot look at a picture of a puppy or a kitten who needs my love because then I’d for sure end up on Animal Hoarders, most likely wearing my rhinestone cat sweater.

Also, the reason this occurred to me is because a Sarah McLaughlin song just came on Pandora and I had a knee-jerk “skip this song” reaction to her melodic, angel-like voice. Thanks a lot, ASPCA.


My love for animals is like ice cream and every time I hear your voice my soul begins to cry. Thanks a lot for the pick-me-up, Sarah.

So, I’ve decided that I disagree with the definition of insanity. Also, totally unrelated, have you guys ever gotten into an argument with a vending machine?

For the record, I totally knew I was right and the vending machine was wrong. I could see the Snickers bar just sitting there. There were, like, 4 of them in a row. But every time I put my dollar in and pushed the button, it told me to choose another selection. Um, I would like the Snickers, thank you. And quit judging me, candy machine. Also, the slogan on top of the machine said “Making snacks happen.”

Lies.

Finally, in a rage induced by no chocolate, I went back to my desk and “worked.” And by “worked” I mean thought about why the candy machine wouldn’t take my dollar. Eventually, my deep thinking skills convinced me that if I just kept trying, I would, in fact, get that snack to happen.

Result: Becky: 0; Judgmental Candy Machine: 1


Clearly not at all insane from a very young age.

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